Monday, February 20, 2012

What a difference a pound makes.

Several months ago I started on a journey to have a healthier life which ment loosing weight.  Because this is a journey I have made many times, I knew it would be long hard and most likely not completable.  But they say it's not the destination it is the trip so off I went.  At first I just made little changes and had little success.  Then I started doing things like counting calories and increasing activiities and saw much better results.  The problems I had were the things that have always been my problems.  First I'm an emotional eater and not just big emotions little ones like someone cut me off I'm having a candy bar.  I'm not exagerating.  Some may say I was an excuse eater meaning any excuse I would eat.  I have a long and strong addiction to sugar.  It is my crack.  I must have it as soon as I wake up and right before I go to bed and everywhere in between.  And let me tell you none of that pink, blue, yellow or even green are gonna meet my needs.  If I wanted to taste the rainbow I would have skittles.  This is something I am still dealing with.  I have allowed myself some sugar daily but I do alot of substitutes also. Next I LOVE food.  I love to cook it, eat it, smell it, think about it, watch others cook it, any thing and everything except clean up after it.  This is probably the hardest because the other issues can be changed with will power but a true love of something is in your blood.  (No pun intended)  I was recently looking thru a food catalog to order so items for a fundraiser I am cooking for and I found my heart racing at the possibilities.  There weren't even any pictures just criptic descriptions.  Now that is love.  Anyway I am getting off track, food often does that to me.  Over these several months I have worked really hard and it is showing.  To me anyway.  Before I ever started this I decided that when I lost 30 pounds I would get my first tatoo.  So a few days ago I got on the scale and I have lost 29 pounds.  One pound from goal.  One pound from success.  One pound from the rest of my life.  What a difference a pound makes.  Because of this mile stone I started looking at my clothes.  Maybe I would try some of those jeans I couldnt get into before and decide my next goal.  Surprise they fit.  Then I had a funeral to go to.  What to wear?  Funerals are never fun but when you are unconfortable it is even worse.  Surprise the clothes I used to wear not only fit but are loose.  Then one day I had a crappy day.  You know the days.  You just want to curl up under a blanket somewhere and hide.  And to do this you need your comfy clothes.  Problem is a fews weeks ago I had went through my closet and cleaned out most of my fat comfy clothes and took them to Goodwill because they didnt fit.  But now I needed them and where was I going to find anything to take there place.  I went to the closet and found a t-shirt that didnt fit bad the last time I wore it and put it on.  Surprise it was loose.  Then I found a similar pair of lounge pants and found the same.  They were loose.  So what difference that pound makes isn't really that much except how we look at it.  Even without that pound I had found so many things and realized that you don't need to hang on to the old things that makes the old you happy because your not the old you anymore.  BTW I've now lost 32 pounds and will post pictures of my reward as soon as it's done.

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